Most people, including many in the medical profession, don't give psychiatry much respect. Some feel that the practice is very effy and hardly objective, others simply fear what they do not know (or know wrongly, thanks to the media). But the past few days in psychiatry has made me realise the importance of this speciality to others...and myself.
Psychiatry is the study of the of psychological conditions and simply put, is the study of the human mind ie how people think and why people think they way they think. With such understanding, one can objectively evaluate a person's thought process and thus appreciate his/her point of view hence improving the inter-personal interaction. More importantly, it has helped me to see people with psychiatric conditions with greater empathy and compassion.
For myself, thru my understanding of various psychiatric conditions, I begin to understand why I see certain things in certain ways, and thus help me put a word to my nameless emotions, giving them a etiology and thus a "mangement". It is a precious journey of self-discovery, which never fails to humble me in realisation of my great imperfection and weakness.
God works in beautiful ways indeed.
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
Sunday, January 24, 2010
Living on the Word
As my church duties finally come to a pause, me and Sam decided to emback on an advanture to visit various churches of different denominations. First stop : Paya Lebar Methodist Church!
I'm personally not very foriegn to the Methodist church, having been to Weasly Methodist a few times. There's much similarity between the Methodist service and my (Anglican) service, so it was quite easy to follow :) Had a sudden realisation that though we are churches of different denominations at different places, we worship the same God, read the same Bible and follow the same creed. We are a family under the universal chruch/banner of Jesus Chirst!
Coincidentally, Rev Jonathan Seet was sharing with the church today about cult and denomination. How do we know if a particular "Christian" organisation/institute/church is a cult or denomination? He pointed the importance of creeds (eg Nicene creed and the Apostle's creed) which forms the foundational defination of our faith. Anything that deviates from this creed is heresy and thus a cult. A reminder once again of the importance of knowing the creeds and treasuring them.
The sermon message today by Rev Lynette was equally thought-provoking. Though "Living in the Word" is no new message, it was a reminder of the importance of being deligent and faithful in reading God's word. I'm now into the 4th week of my disciplined QT (which started with the 1 week fasting, inspired by Sam n a painful encounter with God). Had commited to spend 1h every day with the Lord, but been failing here and there. Rev Lynette encouraged us not to feel guilty or worst, be legalistic about QT. Our attitude towards QT sld be a joyful and refreshing encounter, like reading a love letter from a loved one. Yes! I will continue to keep this commitment to my Lord, to be disciplined to hold His word close to my heart and living it our in my everyday life. Help me Father!
Yup, so it's an exciting day of visitation. But nonetheless, I do miss my own church and fellowship. It feels extremely werid and incomplete to simply walk out of church after the service (cos we didn't know anyone). Realised how much I actually treasure the fellowship with brothers and sisters, even though a short while after service...Ah, abscence makes the heart fonder :)
So a new week/posting begins. Father, I commit my life (and my dear's) into your hands!
I'm personally not very foriegn to the Methodist church, having been to Weasly Methodist a few times. There's much similarity between the Methodist service and my (Anglican) service, so it was quite easy to follow :) Had a sudden realisation that though we are churches of different denominations at different places, we worship the same God, read the same Bible and follow the same creed. We are a family under the universal chruch/banner of Jesus Chirst!
Coincidentally, Rev Jonathan Seet was sharing with the church today about cult and denomination. How do we know if a particular "Christian" organisation/institute/church is a cult or denomination? He pointed the importance of creeds (eg Nicene creed and the Apostle's creed) which forms the foundational defination of our faith. Anything that deviates from this creed is heresy and thus a cult. A reminder once again of the importance of knowing the creeds and treasuring them.
The sermon message today by Rev Lynette was equally thought-provoking. Though "Living in the Word" is no new message, it was a reminder of the importance of being deligent and faithful in reading God's word. I'm now into the 4th week of my disciplined QT (which started with the 1 week fasting, inspired by Sam n a painful encounter with God). Had commited to spend 1h every day with the Lord, but been failing here and there. Rev Lynette encouraged us not to feel guilty or worst, be legalistic about QT. Our attitude towards QT sld be a joyful and refreshing encounter, like reading a love letter from a loved one. Yes! I will continue to keep this commitment to my Lord, to be disciplined to hold His word close to my heart and living it our in my everyday life. Help me Father!
Yup, so it's an exciting day of visitation. But nonetheless, I do miss my own church and fellowship. It feels extremely werid and incomplete to simply walk out of church after the service (cos we didn't know anyone). Realised how much I actually treasure the fellowship with brothers and sisters, even though a short while after service...Ah, abscence makes the heart fonder :)
So a new week/posting begins. Father, I commit my life (and my dear's) into your hands!
Friday, January 15, 2010
Angst!!!!
Grrr.....
I know it's very immature of me to get all emotional and angry about such matters, but my heart is indeed filled with angstiness. Grr...the frustration of plans being foiled, of the helplessness before authority...ARG!!!
Oh Lord, teach me to be quick to listen, slow to speak, and even slower to anger. Keep me in your peace and let Saturn not have a foothold over me!
For interest sake:
angst: A feeling of acute but vague anxiety or apprehension often accompanied by depression, especially philosophical anxiety.
I know it's very immature of me to get all emotional and angry about such matters, but my heart is indeed filled with angstiness. Grr...the frustration of plans being foiled, of the helplessness before authority...ARG!!!
Oh Lord, teach me to be quick to listen, slow to speak, and even slower to anger. Keep me in your peace and let Saturn not have a foothold over me!
For interest sake:
angst: A feeling of acute but vague anxiety or apprehension often accompanied by depression, especially philosophical anxiety.
Saturday, January 9, 2010
A humbling profession
To all you doctors wanna bes, take heed! If you think that being a doctor is all about the glamour, think again! If you ain't ready to serve humbly, please don't take up the profession.
Friday, January 8, 2010
Rainbow!!!!
It has been a progressively down week.
Things started on Mon real bright and cheery. My life finally got into a discipline. 1h of quiet time, 1h of run and the rest studying (or trying, cos I'll be fighting 周公most of the time). Proud to be able to maintain this for 3 days.
But as the week progressed, I realised how much I didn't know, how lacking I was in my surgical knowledge. My clerking was lousy, missing out important points, not able to formulate differentials/risk factors/complications. Clinical examination skills were poor. It's as if my brain's jammed up, unable to focus or evaluate things. In addition, things I read simply slipped out of my mind. ARG!!! And MBBS is in a few weeks time. My medicine stuff is diffusing out, my ortho is extremely rusty and peads is non-exsistant.
I had a nightmare in the middle of the week. Dreamt that I passed MBBS, but on the first day of HO, my mind blanked out and I in a total lost, unable to manage my patients. Oh man!!! I woke up praying (and almost crying). May that day never come. May the Lord strengthen me and help me!
Then there is this whole residency thingy (and I tot is was all over after the submission). The authorities made a last min change (what's new?!?!?) and now we're "requested" to make a decision which SI we want. So I've been receiving so many calls and emails from the various SI inviting me to their open houses. My trust in the system has dwindled and I know that any information provided at this stage is "to be confirmed" and so am really reluctant to spend my time at the open houses. Furthermore, I have decided that I would like to experience working in ALL the hospitals at least once before making such an important decision.
But nonetheless, this episode has set me thinking of my future. Though I have already made to decision not to speciallise so soon, but all these has made me wonder if this is a right thing to do. Would my learning be comprimised? Would my chances of specialising be at stake? Is making a decision now so essential?
As Joel was driving me and Sam today, I was sharing these troubles and struggles with my beloved brothers. Just when I finished pouring out the pain, I looked to the sky and saw the most beautiful rainbow I've ever seen...and I felt like a prayer answered!! This is my prayer since M1 (inspired by Prof Tambyah):
"If God will be with me and will watch over me on this journey I am taking and will give me food to eat and clothes to wear so that I return safely to my father's house, then the LORD will be my God and this stone that I have set up as a pillar will be God's house, and of all that you give me I will give you a tenth." (Genisis 28:20-22)
Thank God for His faithfulness!!! The rainbow that signifies His promise and covenant. I knew at that moment that God WILL see me though this journey in medicine and would cloth and feed me as He promised. I had nothing to fear!!! It's all truly in His hands.
Things started on Mon real bright and cheery. My life finally got into a discipline. 1h of quiet time, 1h of run and the rest studying (or trying, cos I'll be fighting 周公most of the time). Proud to be able to maintain this for 3 days.
But as the week progressed, I realised how much I didn't know, how lacking I was in my surgical knowledge. My clerking was lousy, missing out important points, not able to formulate differentials/risk factors/complications. Clinical examination skills were poor. It's as if my brain's jammed up, unable to focus or evaluate things. In addition, things I read simply slipped out of my mind. ARG!!! And MBBS is in a few weeks time. My medicine stuff is diffusing out, my ortho is extremely rusty and peads is non-exsistant.
I had a nightmare in the middle of the week. Dreamt that I passed MBBS, but on the first day of HO, my mind blanked out and I in a total lost, unable to manage my patients. Oh man!!! I woke up praying (and almost crying). May that day never come. May the Lord strengthen me and help me!
Then there is this whole residency thingy (and I tot is was all over after the submission). The authorities made a last min change (what's new?!?!?) and now we're "requested" to make a decision which SI we want. So I've been receiving so many calls and emails from the various SI inviting me to their open houses. My trust in the system has dwindled and I know that any information provided at this stage is "to be confirmed" and so am really reluctant to spend my time at the open houses. Furthermore, I have decided that I would like to experience working in ALL the hospitals at least once before making such an important decision.
But nonetheless, this episode has set me thinking of my future. Though I have already made to decision not to speciallise so soon, but all these has made me wonder if this is a right thing to do. Would my learning be comprimised? Would my chances of specialising be at stake? Is making a decision now so essential?
As Joel was driving me and Sam today, I was sharing these troubles and struggles with my beloved brothers. Just when I finished pouring out the pain, I looked to the sky and saw the most beautiful rainbow I've ever seen...and I felt like a prayer answered!! This is my prayer since M1 (inspired by Prof Tambyah):
"If God will be with me and will watch over me on this journey I am taking and will give me food to eat and clothes to wear so that I return safely to my father's house, then the LORD will be my God and this stone that I have set up as a pillar will be God's house, and of all that you give me I will give you a tenth." (Genisis 28:20-22)
Thank God for His faithfulness!!! The rainbow that signifies His promise and covenant. I knew at that moment that God WILL see me though this journey in medicine and would cloth and feed me as He promised. I had nothing to fear!!! It's all truly in His hands.
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